[x]

RelapseIt’s like counting
Saturn’s rings,
hash marks
along your limbs -
remembering a time
when

‘just one more’

made you feel better.

- & you’re sitting there
wondering why
Draco, stuck in limbo
always looks like he’s

falling.

Battle in my MindEat.
Don't eat.
Take it easy.
Work out until you pass out.
Get help.Tell someone.
Keep it a secret. It's only for you and me.
You're perfect.
You're worthless.
You're beautiful.
You're disgusting.
Why won't you listen?
They don't understand.
Let me help you.
You don't understand.
Show me.
No!
I love you..

Ode to the boy with diamonds for eyesI think we were a collision course waiting to happen
And when I think back to the day when we first
Stumbled across one another, red sneakers hanging off gutters
Cherry cola voice overs and dilated pupils
We led one another on to believe in the night sky of connect the dot constellations

You wanted to dissect me and peer into the insides of my lungs
Only to find witches breath and dandelions
Slicing iron vowels you locked your hands in mine
And we fell into the static of dreaming disease
The operating table broke away to reveal a sky that never existed
And we couldn't help but laugh at the irony
Because wishing was never an option
The ane

In The Daylight

In The Daylight

A false downfall
An unexpected revival

Sunset to moonset
Shining through darkness

Life...redefined
Death...redesigned

In the valley of promises- I will fear no end
On the brink of weakness- I will ascend
-
Roads of the toughest
Paths of the darkest

I conditioned my flawed limits
So fearful memories won't be paralytic

I had to raise my own spirit
Strength and endurance become so vivid

A chance for change / A moment of fate
A time to make peace / A brief feeling of creed
A sealing of my slate / A silencing of my mistakes
A secret ready to be freed / A chain soon-to-be incomplete

Pain and peace are infinite
Judge the wrat

WorthlessWorthless,
the name that cuts like a knife,
Me,
it's all that you see inside,
My heart,
is breaking with every breath I take
The lies,
the only thing I can't seem to face.

Our MasksThe masks we wear are perfect
Never loose and rarely tight
They keep us safe from others
And keep our demons out of sight

They smile when we are broken
And laugh when we simply must
No blemish or imperfection
A creation that will never rust.

I seldom ever remember
Who I am without my mask
That to peel off that layer
Is such a daunting task

All others carry one as well
Wherever they may go
And no matter what is on their minds
Only the molded mask will show.

The lies they preach in public
Or the scars along their wrists
Are left mute to others knowledge
Ignorance is such a splendid gift

My mask is oh so perfect
Not a crack will show
Alway

wallflower clippingsthere's scar tissue in her throat,
swollen around the words she never said;
dark rings around her eyes
like planets unremembered, and
a staleness to her touch,
the crystalline Dead Sea.

she's living like a story
that's already been told
"if no one loved you
would you mean anything at all?"

in that moment,
we forget to exist.

We are the King and Queen of Broken DreamsStanding still in a mine field, staring at all we have left.
We were so young, we didn’t stop to think.
Now we’re in a car crash, teetering on the brink.
If you were to leave me now, I don’t know what I’d do.

It was a whirl wind romance,
A light when all was black, a spark of something when all was bleak.
You swept me off my feet and made me feel brand new.
I thought we could live forever and I’m certain you did to.

We built a house without foundations
And now we’re falling down,
Everything’s crumbling around us, time slipping through out fingertips.
People used to walk past us but they were to drunk to see,
That our lives are coming apart around us, there is no light as far as we can see.

There was no fire to start with,
Just two broken things, the world had left behind.
The casualties of other people’s dreams of power, money and control,
Spat out onto the curb to rot away and die.
We never stood a chance or so

LonelyLonely.
Unnoticed.
People don't even look
when they walk by.
Always ignored...
Nobody even asks my ideas,
my opinion.
Nobody even knows
who I am.
When people see me,
they either ignore me,
or ask a question:
"Who are you?"
But they don't even bother
to listen to my response:
"I'm Canada."
Forgotton.
Forgotton by everyone.
Forgotton by my friends, my allies.
Maybe one day
Someone will remember my name.
Canada.

Her SideTomorrow she'll be gone,
but what can you say?
Nothing can help her.
The pain won't go away.

But she would've stopped,
you could've said no.
That's what she wanted,
someone to say don't go.

That someone wanted her,
or at least would try.
That someone would grieve
if she were to die.

But you just stared,
nodding your head,
and she realized the truth
with a feeling of dread.

No one wanted her.
No one cared.
Not even you,
with the the love you shared.

So she said good-bye,
and you watched her leave.
She may have had the rope,
but now you can't breathe.

Falling off the EdgeDo you know what it feels like?
To nearly fall off the edge,
but not quite...
just so that you're dangling;
clinging for your worthless life
lest it fall into the sea of loneliness.
Your callused, pink fingers turning
to a shade of purplish-red of pain
as it does it best to hold on.

Splash.

In the sea of loneliness,
everything is crisp, translucent.
There is nothing around you,
you are alone...
unlike other people,
you have no one
clamouring to save you;
you have no one
diving in to get you out.

There is no point
screaming for help,
you will only waste
the little time and air you have left.
You only have the darkness
of the sea envelop

Lost In ConfusionLost In Confusion

My mind is spinning without a rest
Emotions whirl and twirl around
A merry-go-round gaining speed
Until the world blurrs before my eyes
What's happening? What's going on?

The simplest thought slips away
Right from my mind, fading so fast
Trying to focus, I stare and stare
Until my eyes are heavy and unclear.
I don't understand, what is going on..

Emotions rise and fall again
Within the blink of an eye
I'm crying, laughing, and depressed
A roller-coaster ride that never ends
Am I losing my mind in this?

I try to close my eyes and rest
But the world spins me around
I feel like I am failing this test
Voices and noises echo

Deactivatedthere are voids and black holes
and wounds,
papercuts sinking deep into
finger fissures
only to meet the unmarred love
of bones, strong and
bare and pure.

dark oceans are bleached
into tears that leave nothing
but sea salt in my lips

and my words are injustice
to the death of
your poetry.

this is me
drowning,
trying to be
you

trying to preserve the ardor
of your words
and the honey sweet taste
of your passion

it's also
how my lungs work
(when I don't read something from you
I die more than a little on the inside).

You Are BlindYou see a picture.
A girl with a smile on her face.

She looks beautiful.
She wasn't going anyway fancy.
But she wore her black make up.
And her brand new top.

But that isn't what I see...

Look a little closer...
Can't you see the tears that have just been wiped away?

Look a little closer...
Can't you see her right fist clenched,
Fumbling for her over strap bag?

Look a little closer...
Can't you see the left hand grip her long sleeve for dear life?

Look a little closer...
Can't you see her mind is running with thoughts tonight?

Look a little closer...
And maybe you'd have seen the warning signs....

With This RingWith this ring,

I swear to keep myself pure.

To not give myself away until the night of my marriage,

To the one whom God has chosen for me.

With this ring,

I swear to avoid the temptations

That may lead me astray

And defile me.

With this ring

I swear to not only keep my body pure,

But to keep pure my mind.

To not think perverted thoughts,

To not corrupt myself from within.

With this ring,

I swear that all of what I am will be pure

For he who is to be my husband.

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More from ~Missdelayingit

Without a PurposeI dreamt I wore a heart sign on my chest
And didn't watch my feet when I walked.
In this dream, my head wasn't dying.
Then it ended, and I don't know if I woke up
For my sake or everyone else's.

Running For ComfortOne day you're going to wonder why I left,
Why I let you drive me away.
I'll finally be the person I wanted,
Because I learned everything not to be.
You'll have your own living antonym.

The BotanistIt's my words that fear rejection when I pluck them from my brain,
Like unwanted dandelions, except I depend on these weeds.
They fear being blown back into my mouth - through lips that wished them to work.
It's my fear that hates command when I tear it off like petals,
Forcing an answer similar to, "no, I do not love you."
And it hates the choice that says courageous over careful.
It's my demands that rely on ideas when I hand you a rose,
Then wonder if the thought really counted for anything.
Or are the thoughts really just borrowed - passed around like pollination?
It's my brain that holds my tongue when I throw away withered flowers,
Tha

The Reason for LiesYour pointed question pokes at my chest,
Pawing for an answer that will bend your lips.

I could check my head for a lie that's sure to please you
And hope that guilt doesn't get me in the end,
Since all you really want is my agreement.

I know I'd get away, but how far could I run
Before your eyes showed up in my head again?
And how long could I live, knowing I made you smile
With a twisted truth so easily forged?

"At least I'd make you happy"... I tell myself.
Because as long as you stay unaware of this,
Nothing I say can ever hurt you.

So it's very important that you never find out,
For as soon as you question me, all these lies start t

Option #2You're my backup plan if option one fails,
My go-to number two when everything tumbles
Out of my hands and I can't get a hold on life.
You're my escape route that I talk to
When my highway is not so high anymore,
And I often wonder:

Am I also your option two?

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Submitted: February 7
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Guarded

by ~Missdelayingit, Feb 7, 2013, 2:39:17 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

Why do you cross your arms
In front of your stomach
Like you have to
Hold yourself together,
Keep everything inside?
Why do you act
Like you are broken
And misshapen
And all you can do is hold
Onto the pieces?
Why are you silent,
As if a word could shatter you
Into shards
At any moment now?

Any moment...

Now.

Guardedby ~Missdelayingit

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

I've come to realize my protective instincts and habits.

~~love 0 0~~

joy 1 1

~~wow 0 0~~

~~mad 0 0~~

~~sad 0 0~~

~~fear 0 0~~

~~neutral 0 0~~

~Doorbellspider Feb 13, 2013 Student General Artist

Very nice use of that repetition with the shift in meaning at the end!

~Kerriaa1 Feb 8, 2013

Really, really nice ^.^
You write beautifully. It is as if that person who makes those comments knows exactly what is going within this woman's mind, all the insecurities and sorrows are described remarkably well.
It takes a certain courage to write about inner feelings like this but you have done it with such a gentleness and grace that is so endearing.
I love the last sentences, it has such an impact on the whole poetry.
Well done ^.^

~Missdelayingit Feb 9, 2013 Hobbyist General Artist

Thank you for all the kind words. I really appreciate your positive feedback

~Kerriaa1 Feb 9, 2013

You are so welcome ^.^

~Rhiannfleming Feb 8, 2013

This is really good!

*MichaelGarcia7 Feb 7, 2013 Professional Writer

Awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~Natual Feb 7, 2013

Fascinating, i think you put words to emotions which is shared by many.

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